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Single Again..Back on the Prowl! Not Again!

Sometimes I find myself asking myself " How did I get here again?" Single once again and it is not a good feeling especially this time of year. It's boo season and I hate when I see a couple together holding hands or walking side by side. That boils my blood because I feel as if everyone has that special person that they can share this time of year with. Being single is fun and exciting but when I turn the key and there is nobody home to greet me and kiss me that hurts.

Of all the relationships that I had in the past I never felt as if I was number one in their life. I am nothing being second to anything or anyone.  I am tired of settling for less when I deserve more. I always give guys the benefit of the doubt like " Oh it's ok he doesn't have a car?" or " It's ok it he has 6 six kids... Biffy love the kids". I just tired of that and that's really for the pigeons, peacocks, turkeys...all the birds in the world. I not saying that I can't compromise but at least put something on the table that worth dealing with.

I know that there is a common denominator here "Me" but I can't figure out what I do wrong. In my last relationship I really don't know what I did wrong. I gave him privileges he didn't deserve and I still had a bare left hand. I gave my all to this person and I had never done that before but I knew that he wasn't the one for me and I still pretended like I did. I never speak up for myself even though I want to I am not outspoken I guess. There was times where I want to say this isn't working and stayed when I should have given him the boot.

I am tired of giving myself to a guy and get nothing in return but some wet panties from sex that wasn't good even before it started.I want romance and not a depreciated fling. I want to feel special, appreciated, valuable, and worthy of love but I realize no one can give me that better than I can. So I must learn to love myself first wholly before I depend on a man to provide that to me.

But on a good note I am exciting about what the future holds. I haven't been on any dates so far..isn't that sad.Hopefully in the near future I will have another hilarious dating disaster that I can tell you about

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