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Null and Void

Have you ever been in a relationship so long that there was no emotional connection? Was it so bad that you checked out? Was it so bad that you actually started sleeping with a women just to fill a void?

I wasn't aware of how many women there are that actually go through this ordeal. One of my friends ask me to write about it and tell how I feel about the situation.. It's kinda complicated for me to understand since I haven't had the need to or want to sleep with women just because I was not happy in a relationship with a man. Don't get me wrong.. I don't think it is a vice nor a taboo to be homosexual.  I have no issue or grievance about being  gay or being a lesbian. It's all love to me no matter want gender you are attracted to. However I know that feeling of that big void in your life is really heavy on your heart. It hurts like hell...I mean really really bad. I feel as if some women use this route as a way to escape their issues or they assume it will be better.. There is still a common denominator...YOU!!!

Whether you are with a man or woman you are going to have RELATIONSHIP ISSUES. You can't RUN from them.. it wouldn't resolve anything because that common denominator is still there ...YOU!!! AVOIDANCE!!!...Those relationship issues are still there..YOU!!!. That insecurity is still there what ever it maybe will still be there...YOU have to work on YOU first before you  can love someone else better than you did the last person..whether or not they are a man or a woman..That's something that you would have to work through and pray about. Trust me I know how it feels to be left feeling like you are you are just not worthy of love. I know it's hard to turn over in your bed and he ain't by your side..

I mean that is the worst feeling ever but yet I realize the common DENOMINATOR in all my relationship in the past...ME!!!!. I'm not saying that every relationship you had was your fault that it ended..I am saying you still have to recognize that it is what it is..just learn from it..but don't act like there isn't any lessons learned... I would be a fool to think that it was be so much better if I was with a woman or another man when I didn't change myself first or acknowledge my own flaws.. when I know if I don't  it's going to be the same..the only thing different would be how we would have sex...It won't work because you are basing this relationship off a premonition not because you are gay or a lesbian.
 My point is this....  Don't make it a hobby or something you are just trying out for fun because that's when it gets real and then you get those  RELATIONSHIP ISSUES. that will always come back.. Why? Cause you AVOIDED..the Common Denominator...YOU!!! Work on YOU!!!



  1. dont worry, you will never have to feel that way again


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